If I Had Gone to Harvard

I read in an old Reader's Digest magazine that Harvard alumnus Conan O'Brien warned a graduating class they were in for a lifetime of "And you went to Harvard?"

"Accidentally give the wrong change in a transaction," he told them, "and it's, 'And you went to Harvard?' Forget just once that your underwear goes inside your pants and it's, 'And you went to Harvard?'"

It therefore seems I was lucky Harvard rejected me, even after I created what I called a "Dream Book" in which I pasted photos of Harvard College I had cut out of a Harvard prospectus.

You see, if I had gone to Harvard, people would've been like, "And you went to Harvard?" given the way I often talked out of turn, shared tall tales and sent others silly messages.

I was also slow on the uptake. Last year for example, I alighted near a road under another road, thinking it was where Lenny, the person I was to meet, had told me to do so. But when he came for me, he couldn't find me.

We kept asking each other where we were, making him feel irritated. He ended up instructing me to give a bodaboda rider my phone. The rider he talked to asked me to get on his motorbike so he could take me to Lenny.

When we finally met, Lenny told me the road under another road where I had alighted is called an underpass. Then he told me a footbridge was the structure next to us for pedestrians to cross to the other side of the highway.

Apparently, he had told me to alight near a footbridge and I mistook an underpass for one, an ignorance that would have left him wondering "And you went to Harvard?" if I had gone to Harvard.

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RECOMMENDATION: If you've enjoyed this story, you might also enjoy "Blessed With a Denied Dream".