How I Became My Own Man
A True Story
When I was growing up, I was sometimes compared with Paddy, both at home and at school. Some would comment on how I wasn't as brilliant as Paddy. I remember one time in 1998 after Paddy was transferred to a private primary school called Kunoni, a senior brother of mine asked my parents why I wasn't taken to Kunoni as well, and the answer he got was that it was because I wasn't as bright as Paddy.
Well, my parents did eventually transfer me to Kunoni in late 2000, about a year after Paddy had finished his primary school studies there. And when I was in Kunoni, I found myself being compared to Paddy by those who had known him. One evening, for instance, a classmate of mine named Calvin Morekwa remarked to me as we were leaving school that Paddy used to radiate some brilliance. I could tell by the tone of his voice that he thought I was no match for Paddy.
Despite those discouraging comparisons, I beat the odds and excelled in the national primary school exams known here in Kenya as KCPE. I scored in the exam marks good enough to be admitted at Starehe Boys' Centre, a prestigious institution in Nairobi where Paddy was a high school student.
At Starehe, I again became a victim of comparison with Paddy by some of the schoolmates who knew we were siblings. I vividly recall a housemate of mine called Karanja pointing out to me on one afternoon in 2003 that Paddy was a focussed genius while I was a confused genius. Though I can't recollect what I thought of that comment, I am sure it pertubed me.
Then during a Music lesson we had one afternoon in 2004, a piano teacher named Levi Wataka gave us a talk in which he talked highly of Paddy. He narrated to us about how Paddy's musical talent was opening doors for him. A classmate of mine called John must have been impressed by Levi's talk because he afterwards asked me, "Are you really [Paddy's] brother?" He asked me that question in a mocking manner that suggested he thought I wasn't as gifted as Paddy.
Even after I left Starehe, people still continued comparing me to Paddy. A couple of years ago, for instance, I shared on a Facebook group of Starehe old boys a post about how I thought it was unwise of me to go back to university. And wa! A number of old boys reacted negatively to the post, with some contrasting my academic achievements with those of Paddy. One old boy in particular, while comparing me to my brother, described Paddy as a level-headed person who had won a beautiful girlfriend.
Come to think of it, I may not have been as brilliant and outgoing as Paddy during our schooling years but I possessed some traits that made me different from Paddy. When we were in Starehe, for example, I loved giving speeches during evening assemblies, something Paddy never did. I also joined the Starehe Boys' volleyball team and learnt how to play volleyball, a skill that Paddy never acquired.
Later on after we left Starehe, I came to realize that Paddy and I are as different as chalk and cheese. Paddy once told me that he doesn't like reading quotes by prominent people while I am an avid collector of quotes. Paddy also once told me he has a phobia of big books while I love reading tomes, provided they are entertaining, enlightening or inspiring. And I have noted Paddy prefers leading a quiet, private life while I enjoy sharing my thoughts with the world through blogging.
Given those differences between Paddy and me, I wonder why people often compared me to Paddy as if I was a nobody. Maybe it's because Paddy was more of an early-bloomer while I am more of a late-bloomer. And there is nothing wrong with being a late-bloomer because to ever bloom at all is very lucky.
In recent years, I have capitalized on developing the traits and skills that make me different from Paddy. I have taken to reading, writing, exercising and composing songs like a duck to water. Pursuing those hobbies has not only given me a sense of achievement, it has also made me feel like I am my own man. And that, my dear reader, is the story of how I became my own man.
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RECOMMENDATION: If you've enjoyed this story on how I became my own man, you might also enjoy another one I wrote about two years on "My Noru-Moru Days". Just click on that link in blue to dive straight into the story.
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